Utah bound.

Man Alive i'm so ready to be with Gregg already. ( PS.  Rikki Hein got me hooked on that phrase. geez) Last night was looking rough. Here Gregg and I had planned on me making a flight out early this morning. So last night when dad announced to me that I might not even make it out until TUESDAY morning I was devestated. Gregg got my wrath too. I tried to keep calm about it all , but when he announced to me unexpectedly " oh I have to work Tuesday." I lost it.

I told him well geeze that would've been nice to know like uh...Saturday! After debating whether I even wanted to try for Monday evening anymore, I finally had to come to grips. I'll get to see Gregg this week. It may not be as soon as we'd like , but it will happen this week. I never apologized. I guess I should get to that. If you couldn't tell I decided to try for tonight. Dad says I will more than likely make it out there tonight. Even though it will be close to 11pm when I make it out.

So that's my happy/whatever portion of this post. There's more .I get jealous. SO EASY. Just ask Gregg. I've blogged about this before and I'll probably continue to blog about it because i'm just so jealous. I'm working on it though.

I've been jealous of girls probably my whole life. In high school it was Haley Murphey , Brittany Ballington , and a few other girls in my chorus class. Why? Because they got all the solos. I KNEW I was just as good as them , yet I never got any solos , because they were the favorites. Also because they got all the boys ( i'll give 'em this one . I was awkward.) , all the HOT boys. After High School , it was Brett. I love my sister I do. She's just so pretty and stylish and again , got all the boys.

I have my hot boy now .  The love of my life and my best friend , it should be enough right ? Yeah it is. I know it's enough. I know that as long as he loves me , and as long as my family loves me , i've got everything I need. Yet i'm still jealous. I'm jealous because someone else seems to have everything going for them. In most ways i've been able to move past most of the things I used to be jealous of them about. There's something new. Something that might be even more stupid than the other things. Yet I let it get to me. WHY??

I'm happy with my life. I'm so grateful with all the things the Lord's seen fit to bless me with just in the last week alone. I should simply be grateful and appreciate all the things I have going on in my life , yet I can't. That's going to be my goal for the next... as long as it takes. Probably for the rest of my life. To simply be grateful for everything I've been given. To not compare my life to others , because i'm not on other peoples journey in life. I'm on my own.

I know that maybe they have trials I wouldn't want to go through , and they've probably had to work really hard to get where they're at. At the same time I probably have trials going on in my life that they would'nt want. That i've had to work really hard for. So with that said I can't wait to Marry Gregg and start another leg of our journeys through life. Together.