Sunday, February 10, 2013

Honestly

I'm terrible at my themed days I know. So let's just focus on Sunday , and if we get to the other days you'll just consider yourself lucky eh?

So my today's Honest Sunday comes from the last episode of Bones I watched. Basically Brennan ( bones ) tells Booth , he needs to actually write a will instead of writing it down on sticky notes. ( who does that? ) because he needs to leave something more meaningful behind for their daughter together Catherine. So at the very end it shows him making a video for his baby daughter. I bawled like a baby. Because of this...

To be honest my biggest fear now isn't death. It used to be , but now it's not. Now my biggest fear ( as of this last episode of Bones) is that I'll die while Zoe is still a baby or toddler , and that she won't remember me. That she won't remember or know how much I love her. That just makes me really sad.

Gregg says I get really emotional on weekends because I'm tired , and he's probably right. I think I've cried over the most random stuff every weekend for the last month. Last week it was over parents losing their babies. It still makes me really sad. A parent should never have to lose a baby. And babies shouldn't have to die.

And even though I know that the parents will get to raise their babies again after this life it still doesn't make me feel any better.  I am glad to know that I'll get to be with my family after I die , but for some reason it just isn't that comforting to me when I think about having to live without them. Is it supposed to be? I think so. Anyways I'm going to go now before I break down into a zillion little tears.

I'm going to add a lame hashtag now. #emotionalweekends.

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